What does it mean to say it is well with my soul? Sometimes that is a difficult question to answer for we all have our ups and downs in life, some are tougher than others but in the end we feel this sense of peace that is unexplainable. That is where I am today, and have been for the past three weeks. Since we have been back in Moldova you can tell a difference in all four members of our family. I am truly thankful for this peace the Lord has given us.
I will be the first to tell you that furlough was not exactly what I thought it would be, but at the same time we enjoyed being back in the States seeing many people we had missed over the past two years while in Moldova. Our schedule was busy each day, I thought we would have more time to slow down and even relax some. We were tired at the end of most days, but the Lord blessed us with the strength to continue on. His plans for our family were much bigger than we could had ever imagined. As we planned for the next two years in Moldova He began to show us doors to open that we never dreamed of. We visited with many churches and schools, shared our hearts and passions for Moldova and its people, and spent precious time with our parents. Whether we were visiting with family or sharing with a church we could see the Lord’s hand at work. After, sharing our hearts we always felt encouraged that people could see through the stories how the Lord was working in Moldova.
As our time progressed, the last three weeks were the toughest and once again my faith became tested. It seems as thou so many times we want everything to be prefect and we want to see the entire picture, complete in our own time not in the Lord’s time. During this time I did not doubt the call on our lives but instead I doubted if we would return to Moldova. Everything seemed to be in place, we had the return plane tickets, we had accomplished what we came to the States for, but there was one important puzzle peice missing. We did not have the finances needed to return, not just a little bit we were lacking but a great deal of our financial support. This brought worry to each passing day.
We spent many days praying about furlough before arriving in the States. We prayed over our program and gave thanks to the Lord for providing the newly opened doors to speak at various schools and churches. We were blessed with an amazing apartment to call home while we were in the States which allowed us have some personal family time as well. In addition, to a place to live we were provided with transportation for the entire 10 weeks. We praised the Lord for blessing our family. So where did we go wrong or what did we miss. Time was running out and finances were not there. I began to reach out to the mentors and prayer warriors in my life and directly asked for prayer for our future.
One night driving back to the apartment a song came on the radio. As I listened the words they began to sink in and I realized they were expressing exactly how I had been feeling the last few weeks. The song lyrics start by saying, ” They say you sometimes win some and sometimes you lose some, right now, right now I am losing bad.” As the song continued I was overcome with tears thinking that this may be the end of our time in Moldova, maybe God was closing this door. The next verse began and just like the first it completely explained my feelings at that time. The verse says, ” They say it only takes a little faith to move a mountain, well good thing, a little faith is all I have right now. So God when you choose to leave mountains unmovable, give me the strength to sing it is well with my soul.” When the song finished and I realized that no matter the results concerning Moldova I needed to know it was well with my soul and I would need peace like never before.
In the days ahead I changed my prayers, I prayed to the Lord asking for this peace no matter the outcome.
The outcome proved that God still has work for our family in Moldova, in those last few days our finances were meet and peace was found once again in my soul. I am constantly reminded of how the Lord is so faithful to us, but how we fall short trusting Him. Now back in Moldova we feel a peace that is even stronger, as if the Lord has said go and continue the work I called you and your family too, do not worry about fiancees. I think our life verse can change from season to season depending on where God has you, my new life verse is John 14:27
He says to us, “Peace I leave with you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and… afraid.” John 14:27
I leave you with how I started, what does it mean to say “it is well with my soul”. To me it means having a sense of assurance and peace that no matter what happens in life or the circumstance you are faced with God the Father has the best interests for your heart. I can honestly say that if the Lord had not allowed us to return to Moldova it would have been well with my soul.
The song I heard is a fairly new song from MercyMe called “Even If”. I encourage you to take a second and listen to the song if you have not heard it for the words are powerful and moving. Even If by Mercy Me